


Breaking Binds of Control

by always say i love you (love2write42)



Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: Abuse of Authority, Angst with a Happy Ending, Authority Figures, Best Friends, Coming of Age, Control Issues, Controlling mother, Courage, Crossdressing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Family Drama, Forgiveness, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Gen, Getting to Know Each Other, Hints of abuse, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Mind Control, M/M, Middle School, Mind Control, Mind Control Aftermath & Recovery, Mind/Mood Altering Substances, Obsessive Behavior, One-Sided Attraction, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, School, School Uniforms, Season/Series 01, Secrets, Sharing Clothes, Sharing a Room, Spoilers, finding new family, finding yourself, negative thoughts about oneself
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-07
Updated: 2016-07-28
Packaged: 2018-07-22 05:13:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7421329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/love2write42/pseuds/always%20say%20i%20love%20you
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nagisa is being controlled by a drug his class has been giving him. But when asked to do something he does not want to do will he break out of the bonds of control that everyone in his life has on him? Along the way through all of this, he will find friends, love, family and himself. will he ever trust his classmates again? will he learn to live the life he wants? and most of all will he learn to believe in himself? eventually Karma x Nagisa relationship but not for a while(cross posted on FFnet)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Restful Night?

**Author's Note:**

> important info: set early season 2. I originally saw the dubbed so I did not really know that Karma and Nagisa were friends but were distant. After finding this out I tried to add some of that in but they are still really close in this story. Also, Nagisa's mother is unnamed in most of the fic. She also is just as crazy and tight laced as in what we saw in season 2 episode 9 but with a few changes (since this is meant to be before that episode) in there so sorry if you don't like her your not suppose to. Actually, you might not like most of the other characters except the teachers, Karma and Nagisa and a few others. I can't give too much anyway except this is KARMAXNAGISA, KARMNAGI, KARMAGI, KARUNAGI or whatever you call them will eventually happen for a long time it will be hints of the two boys feelings but in no part will it get more explicit than a make-out session so if you don't like don't read. Be warned other pairings will happen and some of the minor characters will come out to play.
> 
> AN please post comments and if anyone wants to beta this story please let me know I would love the help. (IE: I'm not an English professor my fields of study tends to be science so yeah sorry for grammar and spelling. Tried my best but there is only so much that spell check can help with.
> 
> Disclaimer: do not own Assassination Classroom. Do not own Nagisa or Karma or anything else. Yadayada yadda. Yep, that is all there... oh right, there is no profit made on this fic except the feelings I get when someone likes, watches or posts a comment. Any posts relevant to the story are welcome and please enjoy the story.

It was just a normal day for Nagisa to wake up from the sweet embrace of sleep. Ah, who was he kidding it was another restless night for him, after all, you would too if you dreamed of your mother dressing you as another gender than the one you were or identified with. The thing is that for most people this would be a nightmare but not for Nagisa, no that was also his reality. Nagisa had already lived a majority of his life like this and was impassive to the control his mother had on him whether it is on what he wore, the schools he was going to go to or what he did outside of school. Yeah, his teacher was right when he said he wasn't the hero of his own story.

His mother still had one rule well technically two that he had to follow or else everything would just get worst. The first was he was not allowed outside his walls unless for school related things. Yep all trips he took involved school and even went so far as that hanging out with friends was nearly impossible unless they were studying, they had a project, or for homework. The only other way out was through his mother taking him somewhere or for meeting up with his father. Other than that he was at home. Yeah, nothing had changed in that regard.

That, of course, doesn't go into how his mother still had control over other aspects of his life. He still had long hair that he could put up into pigtails most days. His closet was still over half way filled with skirts, dresses, frills, ribbons and sparkles. He had no choice in where he was going or even what he was going to study.

At this point in his life, the assassination job route was looking more and more appealing than anything else. After all, he didn't need a degree or make himself known. Actually that route most of his knowledge would cover more than one thing and no degree was needed. The job was shrouded in shadows, secrets, and silence which he was looking forward to. Ah, but he still didn't know what to do but hopefully some answers would come to him soon.

While this was all true luckily if she was in a good enough mood he could have friends over, but those times were few and far between besides he did not need his classmates and friends to get wind of what truly happened at home. It was bad enough Karma knew a few things and suspected a whole lot more. Nagisa would never tell the taller boy exactly how close he was to the truth.

This was not the only thing wrong with his life. No, he was bullied at school for being in class E where he and the others in the class had to travel up a mountain each day to get to school. That was the other problem that he had with his mother. So he wasn't the smartest in the class but when he consistently ranked low in all his classes mainly due to being so isolated from everyone except Karma and all the while he was pushed down, messed with and ridiculed until the teachers had no choice but to send him to E class.

Though he found he loved class E with all the people, a teacher they had to assassinate -unless he could somehow save the yellow octopus- and a group of friends he trusted. For the first time in his life, he was learning things, he had friends he trusted and an amazing teacher who would do just about anything to help his students.

But as of late something bugged him and he had no idea what it was after all finals were done and midterms were far away so it couldn't be that. His best friend was actually in class except during break times so he actually got help for things he needed. His mother had even loosened her hold on him the tiniest bit when she found out he was 54 in his grade and that by next midterm he might have a chance at going back to the main campus. Yeah, his mom like most people did not know what went up on that mountain and that this year no one, absolutely no one was going to be switching from that class to another. He was enjoying school, laughing with classmates and for the first time, he felt a little bit free.

Little did Nagisa realize that the freedom, trust and happiness he felt was merely an illusion. That for the last two and a half weeks, not everything was as it seemed in his class. No, the warmth he felt would become something of memories in the weeks coming, that the belief he had in others will fall apart, and that what he knew about himself would be changing.

No for Nagisa Shiota everything was about to change; how he saw himself, how others saw him, how he felt about things and how he saw the world.

There was a reason for this and that was that the boy who had been bonded for all his life was finally going to be free. All with a few words by those he trusted and because of his heart. His heart which he hid from the world in an attempt to protect it will break the bonds of control everyone had on him. He would find himself, find the love he had not hoped would be returned, find friends he never realized was there, and he will find the freedom he desperately wanted for so long.


	2. Calm Before The Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of the day and a school project might just be the calm before the storm Nagisa is about to find himself in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT: for the story if any warnings bother you please stop reading. Most of the warnings are for brief mentions but since I do mention them I thought you all might like to know about them so here you go: obsession, mind controlling drugs used without consent, students attacking their teacher (Koro-sensei), talk about assassination, abuse of power, minor mentions of physical abuse(Nagisa's mother to Nagisa like in ep2.9 or I think chapter 149 in manga), mental abuse from both mother and classmates, emotional abuse due mainly from the mind control and not letting Nagisa be, feelings for people which some are not reciprocated (both about opposite and same genders), negative thoughts about oneself and other people, others might be added later but probably not. If anything gets more than mentioning in each chapter I will say something here. I did this as a precaution for anyone that wants to know about which warnings I'm using in this story. any questions just ask either her, pming me or contact me on FFnet (story under the same names.)
> 
> This chapters warnings are: mentions of obsession, negative thoughts, and students attacking Koro-sensei
> 
> AN: Thank you for all those that have read, reviewed, favorited or are following this (you guys are great I never thought I would get the response I have in just a week). So you all know I have planned several chapters. I do have both a fairly comprehensive summary and outline of the story too. I plan to have this a decently long story. Please note that I plan to update at least once a week (if I think it might be longer I will let you know at the end of the chapter).

Nagisa had gotten ready just like normal and had headed off to school on that cool September morning. Just like most days, he met up with some of the others in his class. Today Tekasaka, who actually lived not too far from Nagisa, met up with him first followed closely by Isogia, Hara, and Itona. As they made their way past the main campus they were greeted by Karma and Okuda. As a group, they made their way up the mountain talking about inane subjects though mainly about school and how to take out their teacher.

Slowly as they walked they fell into their normal groups as Isogia ran up ahead in the efforts to go talk to some of their other classmates and Hara steamed up ahead as Tekasaka and Itona fell into step with Hazama, who had waited for them half way up the mountain, which all three started talking about electronics. Some of the others split off until it left Karma and Nagisa that were the only ones walking slowly up the hill talking. They took their time walking as they talked about their teacher and things they both observed over the last few days.

Nagisa smiled shyly at Bitch-Sensei as the two came up to the old school building. Karma smirked just like he always did when he saw her standing in front like she did every morning since she actually started caring about them. Not that she showed she cared but both Karma and Nagisa had figured out that they all had grown on her, just like she had on them though they would never tell her. 

Most of the students in class E didn't have a close bond with their parents. Actually, if you asked any of them who they would go to for help every single one of them would answer one of the three teachers that taught them in their third year, even years later their answer would be the same as it was that year. But we aren't talking about the future we are talking about now and what was going on in their life the year they had a yellow octopus as a teacher and they learned to be assassins. 

The two boys walked in seeing almost everyone was there already, which wasn't unusual for them. Since Tekasaka had come back from a week long illness everyone was supposed to be there that day. Karma laid his bag on his desk before turning to the small boy following him.

"Hay Nagisa?"

"Yeah," Nagisa said looking up at the other.

"Today's Wednesday, right?" Karma said leaning up against his desk.

"Yeah, why?

"Well don't we have to submit our partner for the project due in a week or so"

"Oh yeah we do don't we," Nagisa said. Truthfully he had forgotten he needed a partner for the upcoming project that their teacher still hadn't explained what it was on

Karma chuckled at the look on Nagisa's face. It looked like the boy had forgotten, it also probably meant that the other boy didn't have a partner yet. The red head smiled inwardly at the thought of this. Since the only restriction that Koro-sensei had given them was they could only work in pairs, this was exactly what he had been looking forward to since he came to E class. 

It upset him that they had put so much distance between them. Sure they had spent the last two and half years in pretty much the same class and known each other almost as long but things just hadn't been the same for a while. Karma knew he was mostly at fault for the distance but he couldn't think of a way for them to get back to where they were. There were two reasons for the distance he felt the first was the fear he had that Nagisa might be stronger than he let on and the other was the feelings he started realizing he had for the blue haired boy. Karma could only hope that this project would help build the relationship back up to where it use to be at the very least. After all, he had learned that what he felt for the other boy was not bad like he had feared, and he also found out that the strength hidden under the boy's skin was largely untouched, unharnessed and untrained. Karma was no longer afraid of Nagisa nor his feelings for Nagisa.

But even though they had been distant as of late Karma still considered the other boy his best friend. He had never met someone he had cared for as much as he did for Nagisa. They still talked about anything and everything together. He was sure he was the only one who had any idea of what went on at home for the blue eyed boy. He himself had changed over the last year, they had both grown in ways he still was finding out and Nagisa was still amazing him every day. They had stayed together through everything they had learned about the other and even if they were a bit distant they still trusted one another like no one else. At least Karma hoped that all this was true just like he hoped that the other would help build the relationship to something they could both agree on, instead of being so unsure of where he stood in Nagisa's life.

"...ma?" Nagisa's voice finally penetrated the other boys thoughts

"What? Oh yeah, I wanted to know if you want to partner up?" Karma somewhat asked realizing what the other wanted to know.

Nagisa smiled and nodded happily in agreement. He had hoped that the other was going to ask that after all just because he trusted and was closest to Karma didn't mean that they didn't have their problems. In the last year, they had started to grow a bit distant but then again they were learning about themselves and each other and seeing where they landed on each others friendship maps. After all, they did have their own lives to live and Nagisa couldn't really blame Karma for the main separation. Between the boy finding out some of the things that went on at home and the fact that he started falling for the delinquent, he had stepped back from the one person he trusted most. With luck maybe, just maybe he could save the friendship before it fell apart or to a point where they had to separate to save themselves. But even given all these facts Nagisa knew that out of everyone in either of their worlds they still trusted and cared for the other the most. Maybe he was just seeing things but he was pretty sure that they could rebuild and make the relationship even stronger than before. Nagisa just hoped that Karma either never found out about his feelings for him or he would be okay with it. Because that was Nagisa's biggest secret that he was in love with his best friend.

Karma smiled even as Kayano came up to them talking rapidly with Okuda. Seriously at this point, he was sure that everyone including Nagisa knew that the green haired girl liked the blue haired boy. As far as Karma knew those feeling were not reciprocated but the girl just would not give up on her obsession. Karma would call it an obsession because she just couldn't let him go and he was kind of worried what the girl would do about it. After all....

Karmas thoughts were interrupted as he heard Nagisa's voice again. It was funny that Nagisa was the only one that could pull him from his own thoughts

"...sorry Kayano I can't. I already agreed to be Karmas partner." Nagisa said. "you know how he is he won't do it unless he is working with someone he can stand."

For a moment the girl looked angry but then sadness took over before forcing a smile. She turned to the other girl only for the dark haired girl to shake her head. 

"Takebayashi," she said softly. Karma and Nagisa shared a look after all the two of them had noticed that the black haired smarty pants pair had been closer since they came back from the school trip.

Kayano sighed to herself, she had been hoping to get to Nagisa before the red haired boy did. Sure she knew that the boys had known the other far longer than she had known them. But for being friends she thought there was a wall between the two. Maybe she was wrong that they were distant. That must be it because as much as she thought they were different they were similar too. Now that she thought about sure there were times they seemed distant but other times they seemed to know the other better than anyone else. She along with most of the class was completely confused with the friendship between the two very different boys. But besides that point, it would seem like she needed to change tactics if she wanted the boy to be hers now that she didn't have privet time to rely on.

Okuda sighed at least she wouldn't have to hear the girl go on about Nagisa. She had enough of listening to the other girl when they had been on the island. She looked to Nagisa only to see the boys were talking quietly to one another. She smiled as different as the two were they really did make the best of friends, after all, they say opposites attract. She held back a giggle as her thoughts turned to if those boys decided they liked each other. She knew that she had a crush on the red head but she also knew that they could never have an actual relationship, they just didn't mesh right. Also, there was the fact that they were only 14 and so the likelihood of them staying together was almost none existent. Besides she had her science which now that the vacation was over Koro-sensei had promised her that he would show her how to make a gas that would incapacitate someone for an hour. Man, she loved science and it was more reliable than most people she knew, with just a few exceptions and every single one of them was in the class or one of the teachers.

Karma sighed, at least now the annoying little girl wouldn't be able to bother them after school for the next week or more. Hmmm, he wondered what their project would entail. He guessed they would have to wait for their crazy teacher to tell them. Knowing the annoying yellow octopus they would have to do something like interpretive dance or something just as crazy. He guessed it was a good thing that he got to Nagisa when he did, not only did it stop Kayano from getting him as a partner but now at the very least he would find something to enjoy about the project. So sue him he got bored really easily and Nagisa was the only one to make him actually do the work he normally would never do.

Nagisa sighed in relief as Kayano walked away while he was talking to Karma. The girl was sweet don't get him wrong he generally liked the girl it was just that the girl kind of ... how to put it nicely ah who cared she drove him nuts. There it was, Kayano drove him nuts and not in that young teenage love kind of way but it was like at times it was all he could do to not run from her. Mostly it had to do with how she was so like his mother. They both loved his long hair and the fact he looked like a girl, and they were a little bit controlling and they both loved him at the same time wishing he was slightly different. So Kayano wasn't anywhere as bad as his mother in how she acted and she didn't go crazy when she didn't get her way but still something told him that while he could be friends with her two things were always going to be true regarding the Green haired girl. The first was that he would never feel anything more than friendship for her and the other was that there needed to be a bit of distance between them. He had no idea why this was what he felt but he had learned to trust his instincts especially after the last fight with Takaoka.

"Okay everyone please take you seats," Koro-sensei said appearing as if out of thin air when in reality he just came through the window. He waited as all of his students took their assigned seats. "Okay, today we're doing roll call a bit differently. When I call your name your response will be your partner's name in which they will respond here if they agree. If you don't have a partner just say unknown. If needed I'll partner the rest of you up. Let us start... Akabane"

"Shiota" Karma responded, he was happy that he was first on the list.

"Here," he said before turning to Karma where they shared small smiles.

Koro-sensei nodded writing down the names on his paper on his desk. He had hoped to have some of his matches would pair up but he also knew that these were young teens so some of them wouldn't be ready for relationships, he also knew that he might have been wrong about some of the pairings he came up with. Hmmm, he would have to just wait and see what would happen to each of his students

"Isogia?" he called off the next name

"Maehara," the boy said without hesitation 

"here," the other boy said.

Koro-sensei nodded as he continued calling out the names some weren't hard to see while other caught him by surprise. He ended up having to only pair up Ritsu and Kayano as well as Fuma and Hara. But then he finished he snapped his book shut.

"Okay, now we are going to talk about what your project is actually going to entail."

The class nodded at this they were all curious about what the project though some were more enthusiastic than others. 

"While I told you that the project will be due next Thursday in truth this is only part one of the whole project which will last a month. This weekend you will need to spend a minimum of 8 hours total together. Though you are free to go the whole weekend. But here is the catch, you are not allowed to us electronics for those 8 hours....

Whatever he was about to say next was drowned out by the yells of most of the class. Though there was a few who were shocked but not upset about it. Nagisa and Karma shared a look and smiled remembering a boring weekend night when the power went out for a couple of hours before it went back on but they had turned off the lights and went back to enjoying the night pretending the power was out the whole time.

"Quite!!!!" A yell filled the air. Everyone turned to Ritsu. "sorry it seemed appropriate this time." The class looked embarrassed before looking at their teacher reluctantly.

"Thank you, Ritsu. Now before you start going after me again let me explain... though all this is in the packets I just handed out." Koro-sensei said having just flickered for a moment and each student looked down to see the instructions of the assignment. The class nodded letting their teacher know that he could continue.

"Very good. Now you can have your phone on for an emergency, only the list of appliances can be used during this time, and lights may be used to a limited amount. I will check up on you during the two days. You then will be required to write what you two did during that time, list any electronics you use during the weekend and if you found any problems with this challenge. The point of this exercise is to see how you interact without the help of what children normally use to find things in common with the other. You are free to do whatever you please as long as you follow the rules of the assignment if I find out you have lied about anything then you will be marked down though if you do not wish to disclose something then that is your right to do so." Koro-sensei said. The class nodded this seemed okay while many didn't have an idea of what they were going to during the time but it could be a lot worst they realized as they had heard some students had to do this assignment by themselves for 24 hours straight.

"Now that that is settled I'll explain the other 3 parts. The second one will involve music. Your job will be to work as a pair to find songs that mesh with you. You will have to find at least three songs each. The categories are the following: how you see your partner, how you see yourself, how you interact with the other, how you are similar or different, how you or your partner fit into the world and of course how your partner makes you feel. You must choose at least two categories seeing as sometimes two songs tell very different sides of a person. The other thing is that you will need to do is at least one duet together that is either you telling the other something or you together want to tell the world. The last thing to remember is that while you can make a duet into a single of vise verse a, you are not allowed to change the lyrics unless it is the use of profanity or to change she/he pronouns. Please keep these songs clean children."

The class murmured looking at the second page of the packet.

"But what if we can't sing?" Hara said remembering some of the girls had sung in the showers and some of them made her want to almost strangle them.

A few of the other students nodded remembering themselves or knowing they couldn't sing.

"Um well then you can have someone else sing for you but they will have to say if they are doing. if they say no then don't pressure them." Koro-sensei replied thinking that might be the best.

"What if the song is in another language."

"agggghhhh.... fine you can only choose a song in English or Japanese unless you translate it yourself. But remember you can only choose it if you can speak the language fairly fluently. Any other questions can be given to me after class."

"The 3rd part is to write an essay on your partner. You must answer as many questions as you can. The paper must be at the least five pages long and each question must be a different paragraph. All requirements are on the page out. But remember out of the 55 questions only 5 can go unanswered. "

"Okay, so what about the last part?" Isogia asked noticing that there was no 4th part to the packet.

"Well, that will be determined after you get your essays back. It will be based on a combination of how well you did as a group and what you decide. I will meet with each group individually to talk about what the last part is though you will not have to write an essay, sing or do a weekend together again."

"Are you sure you just don't know what it was going to be." Asked the blond beside Nagisa. The students started murmuring to one another as Korosensei tried to deny Nakamura.

"You should have just said so," Mimura replied getting what the girl was saying and several others gave their agreement.

The kids started laughing at their frustrated teacher as he stuttered out an answer.

"Let's get him. After all, he didn't know what we are going to do to finish the project." Before the yellow octopus could say anything the class stood before attacking. 

Their teacher flew out the window with most of the class following after him.

Nagisa stood inside watching the events unfold outside as he lends against the window only to feel another presence beside him. He turned and looked up at Karma.

"So you okay with this partner assignment?" Karma asked the shorter boy nonchalantly. 

Nagisa nodded before turning back to the scene in front of him. "Yeah I think this will be a good project for all us. After all, there is always something you can learn about yourself and others right? Also out of the others I prefer you... but you knew that." Nagisa said with conviction.

Karma hummed in agreement. But if anyone looked at him they might have noticed the subtle blush on his cheeks at the words Nagisa just spoke.

"Well, at least this projects going to be interesting," Karma said as people shouted at Koro-sensei about one thing or another they didn't agree with about the project as they attacked him.

Nagisa chuckled softly and nodded. That was true it was going to be an interesting few weeks. 

Karma smirked before jumping out of the window to join the others.it was only after Karma left that Nagisa stopped laughing or even smiling. the uneasy feeling was back. He had tried to shrug it off but it still resided in him. He had no idea why he felt this inside the classroom by himself. After all, he hadn't felt it until now. The only thing different from this moment from the last is that Karma wasn't here. Yes, he liked his best friend but he couldn't understand why he felt this way. He could only hope that nothing too drastic would change but something told him something big was going to happen and he wondered if it would involve Karma. He just hoped that the negative emotions he was feeling didn't concern either of them, but knowing his luck it would effect both of them the most. Gosh, he had really need to get out of his head before he started over thinking these feelings he had.

"Nagisa come join us. Koro-sensei said if we get the right answer for his math questions we get a free shot at him." Sugino said when he caught sight of the distinctive hair standing in the window.

Nagisa nodded smiling before jumping out of the window landing in a roll with his knife out. He moved to where the other students had gathered around their teachers they shifted in and out of each other as each took a swing for a transgression they thought he deserved so far in the 15 minutes of class.


	3. Are Storm Clouds Swirling?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are changing in class and more than one person suspects something is going on. we also find out about what the class is doing to Nagisa and how it effects him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> review answer: the reason for singing is simply this- Koro-sensei is weird like in the first episode. I can't give anything away what happens as that takes the fun out of reading but do know this story will not nor ever be one of those singing or songfic story( not that there is anything wrong with that but just doesn't fit this story) I already have an idea how that part is going to work out.
> 
> review comment: I recently got a review that made me think a little more about this story and where I saw it going. They brought up a few good points in noticing some inconsistencies about Nagisa in the story that are different than most mind control victims. As I have read a few mind control fics out there in different fandoms I wanted mine to be different whenever I decided to do one. Anyway, as someone is reviewing this I know there are others out there thinking the same thing or similar to this. So hopefully over the next few chapters, I hope to get rid of any confusion about how this mind control works in with the story. If not please let me know and I will see what I can do to help with this.
> 
> Chapter warnings: mentions of crushes, mind control, mind controlling substances, manipulation, spoilers to last few episodes of season 1, mentions of possible mental problems, switching between different people provs.
> 
> Thanks to all the reviews, faves, follows and reads for this story you guys are great.

Terasaka

Terasaka sat at his desk in the back of the class for the first time all week. He had been sick for over a week with the flu that had him feeling almost worst then the poison that those assassins had hit half of the class with. It was luck that Hazama had the foresight to remember that he wasn't there for the announcement and had already claimed him as her partner. If she hadn't then he would have ended up with Karma or worst yet one of the girls, who he would not have been able to do the assignment with at all, but then again there was only a handful of students he would have been able to stand for the eight hours he was supposed to without the help of electronics. At least the octopus was smart enough to let them partner up as they wanted to for the most part because he was pretty sure that if he hadn't they would be in the pairs that the yellow monster had put them in inside that cave and that would not end well for a majority of the class.

But it was good to be back in class. Hey, who would have thought that he would ever feel like this? That just goes to show him that the yellow being was as messed up as they were if this was what they made them feel like. Hmmm, he would have to look into that or better yet ask someone else to do it. He just wouldn't ask Nagisa to do anything dangerous without asking Karma who would probably just turn him down. He had learned his lesson back when he did the first major assassination attempt. Not only had the octopus scared him, but the fearlessness that Nagisa did the attempt with not caring that it was a good chance he would die. Of course, what really solidified his notion of never involving Nagisa in one of his schemes like that was the conversation with Karma. All he did was promise pain if Nagisa got hurt from one of his attempts. He had seen the last person who majorly messed with Nagisa, the guy had not only ended up in the hospital, it also landed Karma in E class but it also made the guy fear to go to school. Most of the other kids were scared of Karma even before that but after that, no one really messed with Nagisa especially around Karma.

As he sat there thinking something came to mind he had noticed a difference on the way to school today than a week ago. Nagisa was always one of the quieter students but now he seemed almost silent, it might have had something to do with that fight with Takaoka but it had been almost two months since then and it would have made more since shortly after that incident. No this seemed bigger than that because if that was one thing he noticed was that nothing seemed to faze the kid. He might be the weakest, smallest and most unassuming but now he knew that appearances could be deceiving and Nagisa was a prime example of it.

As much as he was unsure of Nagisa now he also knew something was going on between how Nagisa was acting, Karma watching for something and the fact he had seen the other students round up and had whispered conversations when the teachers were out of the room. He wondered what was going on and if it lasted much longer then he would go find the answers any way he could. Because at this point in the game he had realized if they were going to take out their teacher they needed everyone in the class and especially Karma and Nagisa.

Terasaka thought that some of the information he was about to find might lead to a storm, but then again this class had been getting boring anyway so this would definitely mix things up again. He just hopes that no one got hurt, because he definitely did not want to hurt his classmates more than he had in the past.

MAIN

Nagisa laughed at something that Sugino was saying. It was lunch time and with the coolness of the air, the majority had decided to stay inside. He looked around and noticed Karma come back in. Which was strange the last thing he had remembered was Karma leaving and then Nakaruma had offered him her apple juice. He looked up at the clock and noticed it was just a few moments before class. He looked down and noticed his lunch was gone but he couldn't remember eating it or putting it away. It was strange maybe he was just over thinking things again. Yeah, that was probably right he probably just had finished it already and not realized that he put it away.

"Hay Nagisa why is there glitter in your hair?" Karma said standing beside him.

"What?" Nagisa said confused

Karma smirked before running his fingers through one of the blue pigtails of his best friend and then holding it up for said person to see. Just like he said there was glitter all over his hand which had obviously had came from his hair.

"haaaa... I don't know. Maybe I ran under something and not noticed or maybe Nakaruma did that while I wasn't paying attention," Nagisa said running his own fingers through his hair only to find even more glitter coming out. Hmmm, that was unusual. Nagisa looked up at Karma for an answer only for him to shrug.

All the while the two boys were in their own world they didn't notice that conversation had stopped throughout the room. They did not notice how tense it was for a moment nor the relief that came off everyone when it appeared as that their secret was still that. The class was silent after all there were five people other than their teachers that didn't know what was going on and they really didn't know for sure on three of those five. If they were found out they had no idea what would happen. Seriously they realized that if what they were doing Nagisa was found out not only would they have to face Nagisa's anger but Karma's and whoever else found out what they were doing. A few of them realized that in order to continue they would have to be careful while others didn't think about anyone finding out about what they were doing.

The boys looked at the other trouble maker in their class and were just about to ask their question only to be stopped by the presence of their English teacher.

"Okay while this class is usually later in the day your PE teacher said to do it now because he wouldn't be back until almost last period so you will have PE then instead of me. He also said this would be true for the rest of the week so that means that P.E will be last and you won't see the Octopus after lunch tomorrow," She said with a smile though they saw the irritation through it. Whether it was because he had ignored her advances yet again, he didn't tell her anything other than what she had said or if it was for something entirely different they didn't question her on what she said nor on how she said it. Quickly they made their way to their own seats.

Karma was about to leave when he saw the look on his friend's face. He saw the confusion as he looked his fingers. It looked like he would have to ask around about the glitter. If he was honest he would say he was concerned for Nagisa. The boy was confused recently, almost like blackouts but not quite because they weren't consistent or anything but then again blackouts weren't supposed to be, he would have to look things up when he got home. Nagisa had also been pulling away from everyone almost like he didn't trust them. He hoped to find out the answers soon and was able to help him out because otherwise, something was going wrong with Nagisa and there was nothing he could do to help him. Karma really hated feeling useless it reminded him of times that he didn't want to like the fight with Takaoka, he really hated that night.

Karma pulled out his notebook and started to draw. He would be the first to say he wasn't the best artist he didn't suck at but he definitely wished he was better. Gosh, he didn't want to be here but he had promised Nagisa that he wouldn't just up and leave his classes like he always did. After all, he had watched the smallest boy take on someone easily twice his size and strength. He remembered the fight he saw between Nagisa and Takaoka and was astounded by the skill, discipline, and intent that Nagisa had. He was just glad that Nagisa wasn't hurt as much as he could have been and that they had all come home safely from that trip. Yeah, that's what he told the others why he has in class is he didn't want to miss something like that again but in truth, Karma stopped skipping class to keep a closer eye on Nagisa because seriously that boy was a magnet for not only trouble but for pain and misery too. He had promised to watch over that boy a long time ago but he hadn't realized that Nagisa needed looking after still, luckily he wasn't the only one to notice these traits and were also watching out for him.

Nagisa looked at his hands covered in shimmer glitter. For the life of him couldn't remember where he got it from. He couldn't remember who had any glitter, how it ended up in his hair or why someone would do this to him. That added in with other things like his pigtails becoming crooked in the middle of the day made him wondered what he was missing but when he tried to remember what happened it was like a blank space was there. Something was going on and he had no idea what to do because if it was natural there was only so much he could do to change it but the other option was someone was doing this to him and if that was the case then the question remained who and/or what was doing this to him and why him. Both scared him and he almost wondered if he wanted the answers that finding out would give him. He looked back to Karma who was looked up at him. The other boy looked as confused and as concerned as Nagisa felt. He might not like the answer but he knew that Karma would be him through it all. Nagisa smiled at Karma only to received a small nod and an even smaller smile from the boy before Karma went back to his notebook.

Ever since the fight with Takaoka Karma had become closer. Sure there was still distance but every time Nagisa looked around him recently Karma wasn't more than a hundred yards away unless it was unavoidable or one of the breaks. Nagisa still didn't understand why he was doing it but he was happy that Karma was doing whatever Karma was doing. With the recent things going on with him he found himself relying on that present in order to feel safe now. The small boy didn't now why this was happening but as long as Karma was there by his side he felt maybe just maybe he would be able to get through whatever storm was coming.

AFTER SCHOOL

"Okay, we bring this meeting to order to talk about a current problem we are having and talk about some things," Nakamura said looking at the ten other students that had stayed behind. While a majority of class E knew what they were doing they didn't know the details and a few refused to be a part of it but they also said they would do anything to interfere as long as no one was hurt in the experiment.

Because that was what they were doing with Nagisa, they were using him to experiment with the effects of the mind altering Drug. While technically is was mind control Narakuma liked to think that it helped stretched the limits of the mind and made the recipient more willing to do things they normally wouldn't do.

At the moment the drug allowed Nagisa to follow what they asked him and while it worked decently well they had to test the limits. There also was a time limit of about 20 minutes on it. Okuda had helped them formulate the liquid that they used but the girl didn't realize what they were using it for. It was easy enough to lie to the girl about what they had planned. Okuda had only made the formula to make sure that it wouldn't poison someone that ingested it. After that, the girl had let them do what they wished,

"We need to make it more potent" Someone muttered.

Sugino who wrote everything down nodded as he added it to his notebook.

"We need to make it last longer." Another voice Nakamura wasn't paying attention to who said what waiting for a good idea. Making it last longer would be a good thing but they had to keep the potency after all they had tried that the more effective it was the less time they had but the more time they had then Nagisa could actually say no if he really wanted to. They had spent a week testing it until they got the one they were currently using. It was pretty darn effective allowing just about anything that they had tried to do without an argument or without much hesitation for the 20 minutes in between classes.

Sure they had really used it to make Nagisa look or act like a girl, they had asked things they had always wanted to know about the boy though he was silent about who he liked. They had asked him to show some things he learned but no one was able to keep up with him. They had gotten him to help them in homework, which if you asked her was a waste of time but whatever. They hadn't really done anything to stretch what he was willing to do in a few days not since they had him steal something from each of their teachers that were special to them. Of course, they had him return it so suspicion would not arise.

Speaking of suspicion Nakamura had noticed that as of late Karma had been more vigilant of Nagisa. This would cause a problem because if he got the wind of what they were doing all bets were off. Karma held Nagisa close, closer than anyone had ever gotten to him from what she could tell. They would have to change tactics soon if Karma started looking into things too much. But then again they might able to bring him to the dark side, but then again she had to remember with Nagisa the one affected by the mind control Karma wasn't likely to play that game. Karma was generally just sarcasm, pranks, mischief and sadistic but when it came to the tiny boy he was completely different. In fact, when it came to the blue haired boy Karma usually did a complete 180 if Nagisa was against something or was in danger. Yeah, it would just be better for everyone that Karma never found out what they were doing to his best friend. She sometimes wondered how the shy little boy made the wolf become a puppy.

Narakuma had to hold back a giggle as she thought of how Karma was like a dog. To everyone around him he acted indifferent and showy, but hurt his owner and you got the attacked by him but if Nagisa called him off he would look upset but do as told. Hmm, there was an idea was to get Karma sometime and see if she could get him to dress or act like a dog.

In truth, she felt kind of bad to be testing it out on Nagisa but at the same time not so much. After all, someone had to do it and who better than the star assassin, peaceful, pretty boy of the group. Also, she figured that if he found out about what they were doing he was the most likely to not either get revenge or hold a grudge, Karma would not let them off so lightly. Or at least she hoped her prediction was true.

Still, the question remained what to do next then it came to her as she remembered how a theoretical talk turned into what they were currently doing to their classmate.

"Kayano," the blond said turning to her left.

"Yes," the small girl said looking up at her.

"Didn't you have a plan when this all started?"

Kayano was wide-eyed but remembered that it was Nakamura was the one she started this plan with. She smiled gleefully and nodded

"Good. I think it is about time you do it. After all, it has been three weeks since we started to do this, and with any luck, he will be yours soon." Nakamura said knowing that if she said it that way the girl would do it. Truthfully she just wanted to see if they could get the two to kiss. She had no idea on Nagisa feelings but Kayano was infatuated with the boy and if this didn't do the trick of getting the boy to respond then it probably due to the fact the boy was not interested in her or more interested in someone else.

Either way, it seemed like a lot of fun because either she got blackmail material on Nagisa, the two would go out or Nagisa would never know that he had kissed a girl in class. She guessed something else could happen but anything else was practically impossible to happen or just too boring to think about right.

The others had agreed to let Kayano have another go at Nagisa and to let her do whatever she had planned the next day. After the decision, they worked on homework for an hour before heading home. Nakamura had just gotten home when she saw the gray clouds that had been predicted earlier in the week start coming in across town. If she was superstitious she might have thought it was an omen but no the blond was practical even if she was a trickster most of the time.


	4. Who Am I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a shorter chapter. Nagisa truly realizing something is wrong but still confused maybe a dream can help him or maybe not

Nagisa pushed himself up from the ground. He looked around and realized that what he saw was his classroom. But there was no one around. He looked out the window and saw the sun. As he got up he realized he was in his PJs the soft cotton overly large shirt and a pair of gray cotton pants.

Why was he here? What was going on? Where was everyone? How did he get here? 

These were the questions he asked himself as he wondered to the front of the class. That was when he noticed the first difference as he saw that most of the class was in shadows even though where he sat was in bright light.

Questions filled his mind as he looked at the black board which a moment ago was cleaned was filled with words. Different handwriting filled different areas and some repeated. Some of the words he could make out even though it was a mixture of English and Japanese characters. Things like cute, help, funny, weird, how, when, to follow, do this and others but most of it was either too messy or overwritten too many times to clearly see what was written. 

He passed his desk only to see sheets upon sheets of paper thrown across them. He tried to read them but every time he looked at one the sheets either became blurred or blanked out with the exception of the names of his classmates which lay at the top of the paper. 

Nagisa looked back up to his teacher's desk and felt a pull towards it. He walked up only to see pictures all over though they all looked to be taken at a distance, in motion or out of focus. He recognized colors like yellow, green, blue and others but the pictures didn't make sense. If he had to guess he would say they were all pictures of him but why would this be happening. 

Did all this have something to do with his blocked memories or was this something else? Was he going out of his mind or was something else going one? Why did this have to happen to him? He wondered all of this even as his vision blurred and felt himself falling.

He could hear voices of those he know from his classmates to his parents, his teachers, and other voices. Like everything else so far he only caught a few things and even fewer things made sense.

He had no sense of time until he heard something. He opened his eyes only to be greeted by three of his best friends but their faces were shadowed and the only way he recognized them was their distinctive hair colors and styles. They leaned over him with smiles caught somewhere between mischievous and malice but it sent a shiver down his spine and any safety he had felt was gone in an instant. They were closer than they should be and he did the only thing he could.

He screamed.

Nagisa silently screamed as he sat up in bed. It took a long time to get his breathing under control. He was shaking as the dream replayed over and over in his brain until some parts were but a distant memory while others became clearer. This dream or whatever you wanted to call it, was trying to tell him something but what it was he had no idea what it could be. 

Lately, he knew he was starting to miss some pieces of himself he felt incomplete but he had no idea why and what was causing this or how to fix what was happening to him. He had to wonder exactly who he was now, who he was becoming and if he should let it happen or fight it. He wished Karma was here and he could ask him but considering it was still night and Karma had a tendency to sleep like the dead until five o'clock he would have to wait until the morning to contact him. 

Nagisa looked out his window and watched the moon shine. Who was he really because it seemed to him like he was breaking apart and there was nothing he could do about it. He felt tears run down his cheeks at the thought of losing himself but from the dream, he couldn't tell which parts were himself and which had been made up and which parts were missing. Gosh, his life was screwed up as it was without adding a mental break and a loss of identity mixed in with it. But then again life really was never fair to him. So this was what he would have to deal with for now. But something nagged at him right before he was attacked he felt something a sense of protection but from who or what he had no idea and a thousand other questions revolved around that feeling.

Maybe with luck, he would find out the answers soon. But even if he could find the answers he so desperately wanted he had a feeling that would be the first step in a long process. Something in his gut told him that he was in for a world of trouble. Hopefully, he was over thinking things and it wouldn't change as much as he feared.

Nagisa curled up into a small ball on his brothers as he let himself fall into a fitful sleep. With his luck, he knew that things would get far worse before they started to get better but he hoped that he would have help along the path he was about to take.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Please be aware that over the next week I will be editing the story as I realized that some people are having a hard time reading some of the sentences. I reread and admit that some of the parts are getting a little confusing. So I will be editing the first 4 chapters of the story. I'll try to submit the edits as quickly as possible but please be warned that it might take the whole week to do so. As soon as those are done I'll try to get the next chapter up within a week of the latest update. I will also let you know that the other chapters are updated. 
> 
> again sorry for the delay but I would like you all to enjoy this story without too much confusion on your part.
> 
> Constructive criticism is always welcome
> 
> also if you would like to beta/proofread or anything else I would love the help just leave a PM or a comment
> 
> Anyway until next time


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